How many times have you heard that whisper in your heart?
How many times have you heeded it?
Every moment of every day we are faced with a choice: Abandon ourselves to authenticity or live for the approval of others.
Those others may be our spouse, parents, friends, a boss and other significant people in our lives. And we choose every day whether to keep our power or give it over to their opinions and approval.
What if, instead of making a choice, we made a decision? “Isn’t that the same thing?”, you ask. Not quite. A decision is something we do ahead of time that governs our choices thereafter. A decision is an iron clad stance that we take in our lives and then when we have to make choices, we do so out of the decision we have already made ahead of time.
What if you made a decision to stop running and embrace fully, warts and all, who you really are? That way, all your choices to strive for approval and gain recognition would be simple. All the guess work and analyzing you do would be eliminated and you would have no need of a conversation with yourself when faced with authenticity because you have already made the decision to be true to who you really are!
Sound simple? It is! Sound easy? It’s not!
Whatever the reason, and there are zillions of them, we have such a hard time embracing our trueness, it needs to be realized and then confronted if we are going to live a powerful life. And we all want that don’t we? By powerful, I don’t mean to lord it over people or be famous. I mean to impact the world for the better and for change!
Even if your world is simply your family, a group of friends or your community. It can be one person. Look, the greatest, most significant impact you can make is in your children, because they grow up to influence and impact the world and so on and so on. To the degree you are who you really are is the degree at which you will have an impact even after you are gone!!!
Your life speaks all the time. What do you want it to say??!!
I believe that many of the mental and emotional problems we face is because we aren’t true to our own heart, convictions and values because we seek the approval of others or of systems. And each time we do that, we kill another part of our authentic selves. This results in identity crisis,mental agonies and other malfunctions of our emotions AND of our relationships!
So what do we do to make that DECISION?
1st- We need to assess if we are truly living our own convictions, values and opinions or those of someone we may admire, fear or hold in high esteem. Sometimes we give our power to systems; political, educational or religious that dictate our lives instead of following what we know to be true in our hearts.
2nd– We need to analyze why we may have given that power to them. What is it, in us, that will not possess our own power and WHY. It may be that we want to remain victims or allow others to take responsibility for our lives and happiness instead of doing the work ourselves. It may be a trauma that we experienced that is causing us to fear. Whatever the reason, we must own it!
3rd– We must take the time and the space in our lives to discover what we do believe and what we value AND what we want to give our energies to that is in line with those values. What is worthwhile to us and our lives and not just the whim of another person we are trying to please? Sometimes when we live so much of our lives pleasing others and living for their approval, we totally loose sight of our own values and beliefs and they have to be resurrected again. So taking the time to meditate, pray and/or consider these things is crucial to living authentically.
And lastly– live them! NO ONE CAN DO THIS FOR YOU. And frankly, NO ONE WILL! We must be about our own values and convictions in life and stand by them. Even if it means loss of friends, opportunities and, loss of who we once were that was so approved of who is now replaced by authenticity. Believe it or not, this can be almost like a death. But the beautiful thing is, our true selves are resurrected!!
I think of Jesus, who was all about living TRUTH. In fact, the Bible says He is the TRUTH! I look at the scriptures where he told people who he was and they mocked him and wanted to kill him; because the Truth was inspiring more followers than the religious system of his day. He didn’t come to bring religion. He came to bring a new way of living and to that mission, he was committed to the death! My desire is to live just as committed to who God created me to be and to the work He called me to do as Jesus was and through that, inspire others to do the same!
So……stop running and start living! In your uniquely created self!
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